Thoughts of Money

I have those thoughts like everyone does, but sometimes they just rush at me. All the things I'd like to be able to drop some money on. Sometimes I spend so much time analyzing that it overwhelms me.

I think about all the things I own that need to be upgraded or replaced. I'm not talking about the "keep up with the Joneses" thing that so many people do. It's more about things in my life that I don't trust to continue working correctly--Things that I fear may give out when I need them most.

My truck doesn't work at all, and my car is beat. It needs new struts so bad it's almost painful with I hit bumps, and it actually has a cassette player in it. My Harley needs tires, and I'm unhappy with the shocks on it. In my garage sits a dying air compressor. In my closets hang dozens of shirts that are either stained, don't fit, or worn out. Shoes that are worn out or just butt ugly also grace my closet. If I had to dress up for something unexpectedly I'd be screwed... My computer needs a new power supply and monitor (at least). I have no music system in my living room to speak of. I don't like my dining room table. My closets and storage areas are full of things I don't like and need to get rid of.

I think about paying child support--How amazing it would be if I suddenly had that extra $233 every two weeks back in my pocket. I wonder if Sarah will actually go to college. I wouldn't put it past Teresa to urge her to do so just so she can continue to receive my child support...

I think about what a lousy investor I am. I have IRA's and stocks all over the place, and only a handful of them seem to be doing okay. I'm too spread out and I don't know how to fix it.

I finished my taxes last night which prompted some of these thoughts. I had to pay a lot of money last year because of my own blunder. Fortunately that didn't happen this year, but I was peeved when my return instantly went from getting a measly $67 back to me owing $188 just because I entered my interest income. It's like Uncle Sam slaps me across the face for saving money in my bank.

The majority of these thoughts are with me all the time. The frustration comes and goes. The wish to chuck it all and start over and go on a major spending spree.

Sigh.